Self-Injury

Although abuse, especially sexual abuse can seemingly precipitate self-injurious behavior, the converse does not hold, abuse isn't necessary for self-injury. Neglect, either socially or by support does have a stronger impact on whether a person uses self-injury. Self-injury usually starts in adolescence.

Of the people who self-injure: (a survey I did on a large suicide/Si group I ran)
All the participants were very willing to contribute.

About 98% have depression
feel inadequate.
About 95% feel shame, guilt, or self hate
have been rejected by someone who is important.
About 88% feel isolated socially.
About 82% hide painful emotions.
About 80% are obsessive or compulsive
have felt they were blamed for something they had no control over.
About 76% feel they have a lack of support.
About 73% feel they will never get better.
About 66% feel they jump to conclusions.
About 65% feel that nobody listens.
About 64% feels that nobody cares for them.
About 61% feel that everyone else's problems are more important than their own.

As you can see from the above figures a large percentage of people who self-injure feel shame or guilt and do self-injury to compensate for it. Commiting self-injury causes both shame and guilt. As you can see there is a vicious cycle there that is hard to break.

While self-injury its self isn't done to commit suicide most people who self-injure are suicidal. They practically always choose a different form other than what they use to self-injure if they attempt suicide.

Self-abusive people may injure themselves directly, or indirectly by setting someone up to do the injuring, physically and emotionally.

When you've gone too far:

The ER staff all know you by name.
You're self-injuring to the point of black outs, and threatening your life
You can't go for more than two days without self-injury
You feel isolated, like everyone has passed you by
You think you'll be okay if everyone leaves you alone to self-injure
Rather than controlling the self-injuring, the self-injuring is controlling you

Somethings not to do:

Make a no-harm contract with your therapist or doctor
(Sometimes works I hear, but none I asked said it did) -
- if you could handle that type of contract you probably wouldn't need it
- you feel a lack of trust
- it causes fear shame and desperation
Go for a drive -
- if you are having self injurious thoughts you are as dangerous on the road as a drunk
Get rid of anything you could hurt yourself with -
- if you feel desperate to self-injure you could start using something worse than you have been

Pain from self-injury according to a survey by Conterio and Favazza's in 1986:

10% felt great pain
23% felt moderate pain
67% felt little or no pain at all

"Drowning in the dark blood of would-be brothers who, beyond the pressing of fingers, those for whom the slice is only the beginning, and a different kind of light comes in, begs recognition and peace of mind."

-- Judybats

"I cut. I burn. I scratch. I do anything possible to hurt myself when I am in mental/emotional pain. There are other things I could do, and sometimes I do, but sometimes I self-mutilate."

"It's not fun. Afterwards anyway. I know that I like seeing small trails of blood run down my arm, and i like the hot feeling of the blade going across my arm. But I'm not sure why I do it, and I hate myself for it (therefore causing me to do it again... chain reaction)... I don't just hurt myself. I hurt other people. I have had my sweet loving boyfriend bawling on my shoulder because it hurts him, too. One of my best friends looked at me once, the day after I cut, and tears were in her eyes. I hurt a lot of people when I hurt myself, but I never think of that when I'm cutting. Always after, when it's too late to do anything about it."

As told by Jeni

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